“Whut's the plan, Rob?" said one of them."OK lads, this is what we'll do. As soon as we see somethin', we'll attack it. Right?"The best plans are the simplest ones ...”

“Whut's the plan, Rob?" said one of them. "Okay, lads, this is what we'll do. As soon as we see somethin', we'll attack it. Right?"This caused a cheer."Ach, 'tis a good plan," said Daft Wullie.”

“An' things ha' come to a pretty pass, ye ken, if people are going to leave stuff like that aroound where innocent people could accidentally smash the door doon and lever the bars aside and take the big chain off'f the cupboard and pick the lock and drink it!”

“Wanna see how creepy I can be?"-Mr Teatime”

“If they look as though they're worried, we'll move in.''And do what exactly?' said Polly.'Threaten to shoot them,' said Maladict firmly.'And if they don't believe us?''Then we'll threaten to shoot them in a much louder voice,' said Maladict. 'Happy? And I hope to hell they've got some coffee!”

“That, lad," he said proudly, "was some of the worst poetry I have heard for a long time. It was offensive to the ear and a torrrture to the soul....We'll make a gonnagle out of ye yet!”

“Why bother with a cunning plan when a simple one will do?”