“Your own brain ought to have the decency to be on your side!”

“Your Brain on drugs is a terrible sight, but Mr Tulip was living proof of the fact that so was Your Brain on a a cocktail of horse liniment, sherbet, and powdered water-retention pills.”

“That bit where that lad sprang backwards right across the room with them axes in his hands was impressive, though.""Yeah.""You didn't ought to have stuck your sword out like that, I thought.""He's learned an important lesson.""It won't do him much good now where he's gone.”

“Bringing about Armageddon can be dangerous. Do not attempt it in your own home.”

“And he dreamed the dream of all those who publish books, which was to have so much gold in your pockets that you would have to employ two people just to hold your trousers up.”

“Sometimes I really think people ought to have to pass a proper exam before they're allowed to be parents. Not just the practical, I mean.”

“In order to have a change of fortune at the last minute, you have to take your fortune to the last minute.”