“No blame, noreasoning, no argument, just understanding. If youunderstand, and you show that you understand, you canlove, and the situation will change.”

“When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce. You look for reasons it is not doing well. It may need fertilizer, or more water, or less sun. You never blame the lettuce. Yet if we have problems with our friends or family, we blame the other person. But if we know how to take care of them, they will grow well, like the lettuce. Blaming has no positive effect at all, nor does trying to persuade using reason and argument. That is my experience. No blame, no reasoning, no argument, just understanding. If you understand, and you show that you understand, you can love, and the situation will change”

“‎The simple truth is that you can understand a town. You can know and love and hate it. You can blame it, resent it, and nothing changes. In the end, you're just another part of it.”

“You have to predict and examine and understand every argument the other side is going to throw at you. It's not about being the one who's right. It's about showing them why they're wrong.”

“Someone had to be blamed. Someone had to die. (...) What you can't understand, you destroy.”

“Restraint is not a defeat , but rather to an understanding of a situation that puts you at level maturity”