“Be out of the mainstream. I'm out of the mainstream. I enjoy it, who wants to be in the mainstream?”

“I get a kick out of being an outsider constantly. It allows me to be creative. I don't like anything in the mainstream and they don't like me.”

“The Bible looks like it started out as a game of mad libs.”

“I wouldn't touch a hot dog unless you put a condom on it! You realize that the job of a hot dog is to use parts of the animal that the Chinese can't figure out how to make into a belt? -timecode 1:11:10”

“We need more people speaking out. This country is not overrun with rebels & free thinkers. It's overrun with sheep & conformists.”

“Now, I'm no doctor, but I am on TV. And in my professional opinion, George Bush is a paranoid schizophrenic.”

“I have a problem with people who take the Constitution loosely and the Bible literally.”