“The newest computer can merely compound, at speed, the oldest problem in the relations between human beings, and in the end the communicator will be confronted with the old problem, of what to say and how to say it.”

“They ignore the reality that a new version of the same old problem will be waiting at the end of the trip—the relative you cringe to kiss.”

“We all have urgent matters pending," one of the members growled. "What the hell is Nick's problem that he can't be here?""He said it's a labor relations problem.""That's no excuse!" another member exploded. "We all have labor relations problems.""I reminded Nick of that," the chairman replied."What did he say?""He said that nobody has a labor relations problem like his.”

“What was the old saying? If it has tires or testicles, it's gonna give you problems.”

“There's a joke people tell in the Soviet Union: Mitterrand, Bush and Gorbachev have a meeting with God. Mitterrand says, 'My country faces many difficult problems-- lagging exports, Muslim minorities, European unification. How long will it be before France's problems are solved?' God says, 'Fifteen years.' Mitterrand begins to cry. 'I'm an old man,' says Mitterrand. 'I'll be dead by then. I'll never see France's problems solved.' Then Bush says, 'My country faces many difficult problems-- recession, crime, racial prejudice. How long will it be before America's problems are solved?' God says, 'Ten years.' Bush begins to cry. 'I'm an old man,' says Bush. 'I'll be out of office by then. I won't get any credit for solving America's problems.' Then Gorbachev says, 'My country faces many, many difficult problems. How long will it be before the Soviet Union's problems are solved?' God begins to cry.”

“Getting old we can deal with. Being old is the problem”